As many people think that is is possible to have a platonic relationship with the opposite sex, as those that say it’s just can’t happen. Some think that eventually, one or both ‘friends’ want to take the relationship to another level.
A general definition of the word ‘platonic’ would be a relationship between a man and woman that is wholly based on a spiritual or intellectual level without romantic or sexual interest or activity.
An ex female co-worker once told me she had several male ‘friends’ who always looked out for her. She would spend a lot of time hanging out with her pals. But one of them thought that as they were such good friends he would kiss her on the mouth and suggest going to bed. She was horrified that he would consider violating their ‘friendship’. She broke off the friendship immediately and is no longer in contact with him.
From my own experience, platonic relationships can be a minefield. Don’t most of us, when getting to know the opposite sex, possibly start out as friends and if there is no immediate attraction then that particular status quo is maintained.
Emotional and physical attraction can slowly build over time. Your ‘friend’ of six months may one day look a whole lot different to you. You may now desire them and now want to take the relationship on a new level. What do you do? Suppress your feelings or ask them if they would like to go out on a date, a ‘get to know you better’ date.
There are also instances of people in a relationship who are jealous of their partner’s ‘friends’. Who they see as a threat. Maybe these friends are just too friendly that they feel uncomfortable. Some just can’t believe there is nothing sexual going on “We’re just good friends, believe me.” Being friends with the opposite sex can mean lost of kissing on the cheek, holding each other tight and overt emotional closeness.
I do know of a newly single woman, emotionally distraught, seeking a more intimate relationship with a male friend of whom she had enjoyed as platonic relationship for many years. The new close relationship went badly wrong and they are no longer friends and no longer speak to each other.
There is no doubt if you have a good friend you value that relationship as high, if not higher than the love of your partner. But if that relationship becomes intimate, then arguments, fall outs and ‘control’ issues break out where they would not have materialized in a friendship. Is a platonic relationship possible with the opposite sex? Absolutely, it can be the source of joy and satisfaction between both parties. Bur careful, cross that line between friend and lover with a great deal of caution.
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