Relationships can experience added stress over Christmas and the New Year, especially because we may spend more time together, drink more and argue over food, family and the in-laws! If that wasn’t enough, stress over jobs, the economy and general money worries is placing added pressure on relationships and many are going bust over the intolerable strain. Financial problems are a relationship killer, on a par with infidelity and physical and mental abuse.
Some couples tend to withdraw from each other, many others argue constantly about money issues while some people will just walk away from their marriage/ relationship rather than put up any longer with the anxiety of it all.
There is a life line, and it’s within either partner in the marriage/relationship to take the required action. You must take control of the situation and stop the worry and fear from eating away at your relationship.
1, Most people are too embarrassed to share their financial woes with others. Get over this barrier. If you still have a job talk to your boss/supervisor about your job and what more you can do to maximize your output and value you are giving to your company.
Talk to your mortgage lender, utility provider before there are real problems in paying your bills. Usually they are willing to come to some sort of settlement/payment plan to take the strain off you. It’s best to get in touch with them as soon as possible before you default on your payments.
2, Make real and substantial cut backs to your expenses, those outgoings that are not essential. For example, meals out, magazine subscriptions, food and drink indulgence, unnecessary trips in your car. Be creative with your list and you will surprise yourself yourself with the savings you make.
Talk you though your money worries together, because together you are going to work this out. By sharing the problem and coming up with a plan of action you will reduce your personal stress and anxiety about the future.
3, Adopt a positive attitude even if your situation seems dire. You can only function, think, and react with hope for the future by eliminating corrosive negative thoughts and actions. Your health and well-being will pick up when both of you are in a positive frame of mind. You could write down all the things you are grateful for in your life and relationships. Believe that your set backs are temporary. Life is a series of highs and lows and nobody is exempt from bad things happening to them.
When you can approach your problems as a team, together, you are naturally stronger. Approach your problems with a positive attitude and share those problems with others, including family and friends, and those hardships will not feel quite so insurmountable.
Going into 2012 there seems little prospect that the economies of Europe and North America will improve. Many more jobs will be lost,and companies close in the coming months. All the more reason for couples to pool their hopes, dreams and resources together, for the benefit of family and the relationship.
Do you know of any more survival tips?
